Everyone is Lonely
John, who organizes church socials, sees people come and go while the depth of relationships stays shallow. Judy can’t seem to find people to hang out with at all. Mike can’t seem to get past the cultural differences that he’s facing with the people around him.
Everyone I know is looking to belong and yet so few people have a solid community of friends. You would think that with everyone wanting it, more of us would have it! How have we as a generation lost all ability to form healthy relationships with the people around us? Is it our amazing independence? Do we all have these thick walls built around us? Or does the global market move us around too often to get roots?
Perhaps part of the problem is that we want relationships on our own terms. And, being that relationships are exactly not just on our own terms, we falter. We can’t get prepackaged friendships! Real relationships take work and commitment. They require us to drop our perfectly planned agenda to help people move, to take them cookies, or to bear their burdens through the death of a loved one. Not just occasionally, but consistently, so that we can be people who others rely on.
Even as I talk to people about being good friends to get good friends, no one seems willing to make the effort. Or if they do, they don’t want to let people take anything from them.
So what will it be for us as a generation…
community or independence?
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